IS "EVERY THING FAIR IN LOVE AND WAR" ?

dear friend,
one of my nearest and dearest friends gave the statement -
"every thing is fair in love and war."
i don't agree with the thought of every thing being fair.
either in love or in war how can every thing be fair?
what ever is fair is fair always,
and what ever is foul is always bound to be foul.
in love we love the fair aspects of the personality,
whom we love.
and in war even we condemn the foul deeds
done by either our friends or our enemies.
the inhuman ideas and acts can never be glorified.
a cheat is always a cheat.
a fraud is always a fraud.
and even any lie can never be the truth.
we can appreciate
only the fair, human and just stands and deeds
of both our friends and enemies.
mercy is always respected
and cruelty is always hated.
to forget and forgive is more valuable than any revenge.
to adjust, avoid and tolerate is necessary
for co existence.
to expect from others
is only an indication of
our own performance of the same level.
and destruction is never valuable than creation.
only creation is always valuable than destruction.
what is your opinion ?
with love - your's girijesh